Entry for February 5, 2009

Entry for February 5, 2009

Can’t sleep. Too many thoughts running through my head. Some deep, some totally asinine. Listening to the Airbourne Toxic Event Sometime Around Midnight. I  can totally relate to this song. Suppose everyone can.

I have so much to get done at work, it’s like I can hear every hour tick tocking away. My cat has come and joined me, at least with nocturnal friends you have company on nights like these. I like this picture of me so I am posting it. 🙂 I’m thirsty.. be back.

Back. So I saw this guy from a distance the other day that I was totally hung up on for years and years and I was like Wow! You so don’t have anything I want anymore. I have on occassion been really down thinking I missed out on something fabulous it’s weird to now know without a doubt that I didn’t.  His life as it is now, married and routine, is so not what I ever wanted. It was affirmation that I made the right choice that even though I am sometimes lonely it was better to never settle and still hold out for what and who will work for me. Working all day, coming home to pay bills and family style trips to Florida just would never cut it for me. Life without passion would be no life at all. Guess all things do come full circle. I’ve been finding lately that I’m leaving that phase of self doubt behind. Thank God!

I feel like I am finally getting out of the rut I have been in. Yeehaaa! It’s on. Seriously if anyone actually reads this thing of mine jump straight past the depressed and blah stage and take the reigns to getting yourself out of the rut you have caused or allowed yourself to be pushed in to. It starts small but each time you push back you get further and it gets easier. If you need someone to be your cheering squad email me.

Hmmmm… think I am going to try and read for awhile. If I start watching TV I will find one of those sucky horrible b movies that drags you in until the end and I will never get to sleep. Can’t wait for the weekend, 19 degress today…54 on Sunday. BIG SMILE, MUCH HAPPINESS!!! WINTER IS ON ITS’ WAY OUT! 

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