Hello stranger. I can still remember exactly how you sound when you say that. How lucky am I to have had the romance of a lifetime? Seriously the shit you read about in books. Thank you for that.
White button downs that smelled like you. Midnight in the hay loft. Running to your car in the pouring rain. Driving to fast down dark roads. All those hours spent wrapped in each other and there was nothing else in the world. That sly half grin. You were everything,
I drive by the barn sometimes but you took the magic with you.
When you’re 47 and single people assume you’re bitter and you don’t believe in love. Can’t every happen because there will always be you.
My Mom finally asked me once years later why I didn’t marry you, Because I loved you.
Just thinking about you today.
So distracted, things that should take 5 minutes are taking an hour. That’s what letters never meant to be sent are for. My heart already knew but I was hoping. Hoping what exactly I don’t know. You care about someone you should wish them happiness and I do but….. just wish you had picked me for a little while. That’s insane right? When I woke up Sunday it was the first thing I saw, and I just flipped. That hollow nauseous feeling. Couldn’t deal so I clicked that unfriend button. Self-preservation at its finest.
I know it’s not rational, I know I don’t not want to be friends with you. But I know I also just severed the last tie. Snip. You’ll probably never know how much it took to do that, you’ll probably think I’m being a bitch or an asshole of some sort. Asshole? Maybe. I am sorry, but I just don’t want to see it, can’t. It will drive me batshit. Can’t change the way I’m wired. It’s driving me nuts anyway as this letter can attest to. Truth is it could be worse.
Guess I knew this would come eventually. I’m not exactly stupid and I’ve always handled things with reason before. Guess it’s to close to the last trap. Every time I work it out in my head that nope it’s not going to happen and was good letting it go, there you were. And that hope would spark. I’d considering doing the smart thing for about 5 seconds and then away I’d go. Piper is getting paid.
That’s the part that pisses me off because I shouldn’t have to pay and the price I gambled was too high.
Cancer, in 2018 love is definitely in the air! If you walk into the New Year single, you can smile wide and remain confident that the universe plans on offering you incredible opportunities to meet someone with the power to really open your heart and bring you to your knees. It all began on October 10, 2017, when Jupiter, the planet of expansion and blessings, moved into your true love sector for the first time in over 12 years. This cycle is no minor event, and Jupiter will remain here through November 8, 2018. As a result, delicious possibilities lie ahead for you in matters of the heart.
You are certainly craving more depth in your love life this year, and a casual affair simply will not do. So when you meet someone who has an air of mystery and gives off that magnetic vibe screaming “There is so much more underneath the surface,” you’ll find yourself hooked. You could meet this person at any time between now and early November, but pay close attention to a first meeting with someone near May 25 or August 19 when Jupiter makes a perfect link to Neptune. The universe might very well send you a soul mate during these times. An ex might also come back into your life from October 5-31 while Venus is retrograde, and if so, you might find yourself hopelessly drawn in.
If you’re already in a relationship, there is no shortage of support for you and your mate. On January 15, April 14, and again on September 12, Jupiter will make a perfect link to Pluto, the planet of transformation, now in your partnership sector. You and your spouse or partner might focus your attention on your children and empowering them to become the best adults they’re capable of. If you have children together, you’ll be in harmonious agreement about all childrearing matters, making it easier for you to feel romantic with your love behind closed doors. If you’re considering having a baby, this might be your year. Fertility will be strong!
At the same time however, Saturn, the planet of structure and responsibility, will also move through your 7th House of Partnership. If you and your mate are committed, you’ll work through any rough patch together. If, however, you feel as if your relationship has become nothing but a burden, you’ll have to start getting real about how much you have left to give.
From : tarot.com
Almost lost this blog again, thought I moved it to the new server but didn’t. So sorry my little bitching system, but I do love you enough to pay the renewal few for another month to get you back. Coincidentally, found some of the original theme files, Kerri’s Cherry from 20+ years ago so I took a moment and styled you retro again. Hey fixed backgrounds were cutting edge! Now you’re back to being a bit loud and obnoxious just like me!
Another year is coming to an end. 2017 you have largely sucked! But there are 27 days left for good things to happen so……. See you when I write the end of year post.
It’s the day before the 46th hence the selfie post for the pet project and yes I am Rosemary’s baby, for real. The evil is strong. Only experiencing a slight breakdown about it, guess because it’s not a milestone, more like purgatory before the big 50.
Apparently one of the side effects of Graves Disease is appearing younger than you are, between that and good genetics haven’t had to do the Botox yet but soon. My brother doesn’t at all look his age either. Crappy teeth but minimal wrinkles, I’m shallow enough to take it.
So this is really the year it has hit home that there will be no progeny out in the world from me. Although it was never a driving need or truly even more than a slim maybe in the plan, still kind of a sad thing. I think more a case of an opportunity having been lost than any driving maternal instinct. I know with science all things are possible but that doesn’t mean they should be, for me anyway and 45 was the hard cut-off unless God intervenes.
Working, playing, reading too much. I live a very exciting life. Oh and my flowers, aren’t they pretty? There are a lot more but this is the handy pic.
Happy enough, worked very hard the past few years to find a place of zen within myself and have succeeded for the most part. Crazy temper is still there just sleeps later than it used to. Still no happily ever after, but would rather be single than settle. Always been an all or nothing kind of girl and the good thing that comes with age is no one can make me think that’s wrong or doubt myself about it anymore. It was never being “picky” as people liked to say, it was wanting and needing the “I’d burn the world down for you” or taking a pass. Had a grand romance I can smile about when I’m 80, I’m good with that.
And with that I’ve made a post so going to sit here with some coffee and tune back into Being Human (UK version) , S3 Ep4.
If someone besides myself happens upon this I’ll share my birthday wish with you, may whatever you’re wishing for come true.
Happy New Year!
Leaving my 2017 horoscope here to look back on at the end of the year.
Jun 22 – Jul 22
Intuitive you knows where you belong and feel safe, and in 2017 you create your ideal home. Whether it’s a return to old roots, or simply redecorating where you have resided for years, it’s what will keep you healthiest and at your most productive this year. Working at home brings you your greatest success, as does healing family patterns which you fear may have passed into the present generation. You are the true healer of your family line.
Until October 10, 2017, opportunities present themselves effortlessly in terms of property, whether it’s the perfect designer appearing, or the offer to buy at an incredible price. Take advantage of these blessings because lucky Jupiter will not bring them round again until 2028 – that’s in twelve years. How old will you be then?
Work is also extremely successful for you this year, with karmic Saturn urging you to learn more professionally. You excel by challenging yourself, pushing yourself further than you thought possible, evolving into an expert in your field.
Finally, love, which causes you a dilemma mid-year. A part of you has been restless, and yet of course it’s difficult for you to let go of what you know. Here is where you need to be most courageous, dear Cancer, and give yourself what you deserve. The system you have created has outgrown itself, and is ready to reshape itself into something new. Allow this to happen, and you experience great happiness.